Ask Legolas! (part one)

*crashing in the background*

*muffled yell*

*door opens and LEGOLAS crashes  into the desk*

LEGOLAS: ...ow...
Ouch. Ok, NOBODY SAW THAT. *sits in chair*
So, um, hi. I am Legolas Greenleaf--

GIMLI: *from inside closet* ...everybody knows that, laddie...

L: Stop calling me "laddie"! That is SO not Elvish.

G: *grumbling inside the closet*

L: I guess I should tell everyone why we-- I mean I--am here. The door I just came through is obviously magical. Here's a picture of it:

We--Gimli and I--happened upon it right in the middle of Mirkwood, and I decided to go through. It was EXTREMELY dark in there, and I think there were a lot of random things lying around--that's what all that crashing was about up there--but finally, I saw a light a far way off. I went through...no, I was catapulted through, and crashed MOST ungracefully into this....table thing.

G: IT'S CALLED A DESK! HOW ARE YOU EVER GOING TO FUNCTION IN THE REAL WORLD, LADDIE???

L: *looks around dryly* I think I'm doing ok so far...

G: *realizing he walked right into that one* Oh, of all the....hrmph.

L: Anyway, Gimli is for some reason still in there, and I am here to....um...actually I have no idea what I'm doing here. Oh, I know! I can end this post here, and you readers can ask me any questions you have about Lacy, because I know her really well, seeing as, hahaha, I just found what looks like her diaryyyyyyyy! So I am gonna stop now, and you start asking questions! Lacy won't mind me doing this, I'm sure--

G: ...really?

L: --um...*goes red* Anyway, ask any question you have and I'll get back to them! See you later, everyone!

G: GET ME OUT OF HERE! I CAN'T SEE!

L: *turns to leave and narrowly misses falling over a stool* Oh, how undignified...*groans* NOBODY SAW THAT. Any way! Bye! I'll be back soon to answer your questions!

LEGOLAS